If anyone ever interested, I was a graduate of international relations.
During 4 years of my college years, I had a fair share of uh… criticizing policies, made a dilettante-level analysis about things from political matters to personal behavior of a world leader. Had a dream to be involved in high-level political meetings, or at least be the one who critically criticize and see through bull-craps of politician.
Philosophy also had a fair time residing in my brain, read and instill several tenets from philosophy, apply it to real life and get a pair of contrarian spectacles. You know, the tenets of philosophical thoughts that made me see through bullshits whenever I see one. Though I’m not sure about its accuracy, but my intuition in smelling bullshits seemed accurate.
Combination of both above mentioned provides a brand-new way of looking, perceiving, and predicting things for me. At a moment I could be ultra-sensitive and suspicious, questioning everything as if I’m a Sherlock Holmes. Other moment I could have goosebumps feeling extreme cringy whenever I see something like that overly formal and unnecessary dialogues from cheaply produced bad (Indonesian) soap operas. And other permutation that I couldn’t name it here, but has happened.
Back in college, this sort of perspective helped me went through college and feeling like high caliber political pundit or anything. I continuously told people that politic matters, kept quoting Aung San Suu Kyi’s infamous quote. You know, “politics may not be important for you, but politics is all about you” that sort. Told my analysis to people (Now I feel it was uncalled for) about this and that.
Ugh, now I cringed.
Especially, when it comes to recent sequences that happened subsequently. It’s distress–no, actually it wasn’t distressing for me. I just happened to found a bigger picture than this whole world combined. A religious perspective of course, which I believe is the utmost truth, and I’ll stick with that to the end of my time.
Sticking to that perspective makes me feel like anything earthly isn’t as important. Plus, the world’s getting rough and worse, too.
And people…. They are making assumptions (backed with logics, okay) on literally everything. They’d write thousands of lines on their social media, voicing out their thoughts–which is okay by the way, but a bit bugging. Instead, I found it to be my latest pet peeve. The other user then would share it, act like it is true (sometimes it does) and would echo the message anywhere. A perfect day for discourse to set itself in the motion. Voila, then you got yourself a public-made opinions… and a changed mind.
Being tired of that, I decided not to care anymore. Like, this world has been taken care by millions of people. Why would I still think to spend my precious amount of energy to make fuss something that’s: 1. Not my forte 2. Not my cup of tea 3. Don’t affect me much
I would rather take care of people I cherish and just go on with life. I’d still elect, think about the economy, but delve in like I used to? Nah, I’ll pass.