Do people actually ‘there for you’?

No, no. This is not a philosophical question that asks whether or not what you see is an independent object. Nor is it questioning reality.

This is just a simple, plain question about the overrated “I will be there for you” or people who self-proclaimed that they care for others.

A Quora thread discussed this and it got me thinking, do people actually care?

Dale Carnegie said in his book How To Win Friends and Influence People, that to be interesting, be interested. In other words, it’s the same as: to make people care for you, care for others.



But do that advice applies in the real world? I’m not sure. In major event like disasters, care is priority, I would not question that though.

However, in a smaller scale, singular people-to-people interaction, this definition of care should be questioned.

I just stumbled upon an image that said

“Only those who care about can hear you when you are quiet

So far I only found a single hand amount–no, less than single hand amount of that kind of person.

My sense are totally sensitive when it comes to hear and understand what people are currently going through–how they feel. Understand them by placing myself in their shoes, mentally.

Ideally at this time I should have quite a lot friends with that quality. That was my expectation.

But sadly, no. People are too busy of themselves–of their problem. Carnegie couldn’t be more right. Africa’s hunger problem is no more important than one person’s teethache, world famine is no more important than one person’s heartbreak.

At this time, I find it almost impossible for people to… Spare their precious time to understand what I think about. I had been posting some gloomy words, but in other person’s sense it’s just a words worth of like button.

So when people say “don’t worry I’ll be there for you” 99% percent I’ll take that as a straight bullshit. Come on, you’re too greedy to even spend your time thinking about what I think.

“The world does not owe anything to you” is a proper counter for my words above mentioned. In case of emergency, use that word to get away from people’s problem. Seriously.

I once heard a story, a friend ask his close friend why they didn’t invite him to a trip and just uploaded a picture of them having fun. They said “I deserve to be happy, man. I’m stressed too”.

If you, who happened to read this, is a person with angelic heart who is sensitive to your surroundings and proactively ask people who suddenly silent “what’s wrong” and continue spend your freaking precious time to know a lot more and console those people, I tip my hat off and give you a gold medal because seriously, you are an MVP.

Seriously, I can grow a misanthropy trait because of this.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s